Thursday, 24 September 2009

Where no man has gone before

I just found out there's nothing quite so unpleasant as a strange man sticking a probe up your willy to check your bladder is in good working order. They told me the gel was an anaesthetic. Ooooh really? Next time, I pray they whack me over the head with a 2-pound ball hammer. "I hope you're not going to faint on me?" said the pleasant nurse, who probably does 1,000 of these routine inspections a day. No, but I did sob a little.

This experience topped the man sticking a finger (at least I hope it was a finger) up my bum a few weeks ago to check my nether region bits were fully functional. I believe I let out an embarrassed squeak.

Still, you've got to laugh. Although oddly enough, I didn't. Three cheers for the NHS!


Sophia said...

The NHS: Created by aliens who realised that it's so much easier, instead of abducting people from remote farmland locations to probe them, to get them to make an appointment and come to you.

Derek said...

Now that you've revealed the Master Plan, they won't rest until they have you laid out on the cold metal table.