Just saying, I dug up files for my old AOL website (which vanished when AOL Hometown's plug got pulled) and reloaded 'em into new webspace -- partly for nostalgia's sake, and partly so I could find stuff I kept losing track of!
It's pretty damn weird to browse old Best Openings Contest entries from yesteryear and not even remember writing them... even when many went on to become short stories or chapters. Stupid brain cells, work harder!
Friday, 23 October 2009
Thursday, 24 September 2009
Where no man has gone before
I just found out there's nothing quite so unpleasant as a strange man sticking a probe up your willy to check your bladder is in good working order. They told me the gel was an anaesthetic. Ooooh really? Next time, I pray they whack me over the head with a 2-pound ball hammer. "I hope you're not going to faint on me?" said the pleasant nurse, who probably does 1,000 of these routine inspections a day. No, but I did sob a little.
This experience topped the man sticking a finger (at least I hope it was a finger) up my bum a few weeks ago to check my nether region bits were fully functional. I believe I let out an embarrassed squeak.
Still, you've got to laugh. Although oddly enough, I didn't. Three cheers for the NHS!
This experience topped the man sticking a finger (at least I hope it was a finger) up my bum a few weeks ago to check my nether region bits were fully functional. I believe I let out an embarrassed squeak.
Still, you've got to laugh. Although oddly enough, I didn't. Three cheers for the NHS!
Saturday, 22 August 2009
Just a quickie for those who have asked:
The 3D models that appear in my comics were made using Google SketchUp, a free-to-use 3D modeller that has to be one of the easiest graphics tools I've ever used (in a previous existence I worked for an IT giant as CAD systems tech support... and before that I was Cleopatra, Queen of Egypt... no, wait, scrub that last).
SU runs happily on my wee 1.6GHz laptop with 2Gb memory running Vista. It's a nice piece of software, try it out, shout if you need any help. :)
One of these days I'll put up a quickie tutorial showing the steps from the basic draw-a-rectangle, pull into a prism...
...to an uncannily odd head with movable eyes, eyebrows and mouth variants.
But most of all, I loves makin' them ships:
The 3D models that appear in my comics were made using Google SketchUp, a free-to-use 3D modeller that has to be one of the easiest graphics tools I've ever used (in a previous existence I worked for an IT giant as CAD systems tech support... and before that I was Cleopatra, Queen of Egypt... no, wait, scrub that last).
SU runs happily on my wee 1.6GHz laptop with 2Gb memory running Vista. It's a nice piece of software, try it out, shout if you need any help. :)
One of these days I'll put up a quickie tutorial showing the steps from the basic draw-a-rectangle, pull into a prism...
...to an uncannily odd head with movable eyes, eyebrows and mouth variants.
But most of all, I loves makin' them ships:
Monday, 17 August 2009
Just posting to keep the blog alive!
Had a bit of fun today with this, the actualization of sci-fi stories from 'way 'way back in the past, possibly from my schooldays!
Bet you can't guess what it's based on. No, not Doctor Who. No, not Lost In Space. No, not Phoenix Five. Who said Phoenix Five?! Aieee!
Had a bit of fun today with this, the actualization of sci-fi stories from 'way 'way back in the past, possibly from my schooldays!
Bet you can't guess what it's based on. No, not Doctor Who. No, not Lost In Space. No, not Phoenix Five. Who said Phoenix Five?! Aieee!
Saturday, 20 June 2009
Whispers in the night
Heh, spot the dead blog, win a prize. Not much excitement happenin' lately, which is just the way I likes it, but alas this doesn't make for daily updates.
I'm still fiddlin' about with the webcomics,
...which tickles my creative spark and fools the Muse enough so she doesn't bug me much about not writing anything new for months.
In spare moments I've been tinkering with a couple of older novellas that are staggeringly brilliant but want to spread their wings and be novels, which is more of a start-over-from-scratch deal. They're whispering to me in the night. I hate when that happens.
Not watching much TV lately but that's 'cause there's not much Sci-Fi showing (yeah I still call the genre "Sci-Fi" -- you wanna fight about it?). About the only shows I tune into are Dollhouse and The Mentalist. And Buffy re-runs.
OK, that's this year's blog updates taken care of...
I'm still fiddlin' about with the webcomics,
...which tickles my creative spark and fools the Muse enough so she doesn't bug me much about not writing anything new for months.
In spare moments I've been tinkering with a couple of older novellas that are staggeringly brilliant but want to spread their wings and be novels, which is more of a start-over-from-scratch deal. They're whispering to me in the night. I hate when that happens.
Not watching much TV lately but that's 'cause there's not much Sci-Fi showing (yeah I still call the genre "Sci-Fi" -- you wanna fight about it?). About the only shows I tune into are Dollhouse and The Mentalist. And Buffy re-runs.
OK, that's this year's blog updates taken care of...
Tuesday, 24 March 2009
Winning is for losers!
Over on the Done Deal screenwriters' message board, in the Writing Exercises forum, the man known only as JCorona has been running a fun "March Madness" short script contest (up to 5 pages, any genre). Kind of an annual event now.
I hadn't written anything script-ish for a while — heck I even blew this year's V.D. Contest (er, that's Valentine's Day, not...) — so I decided I'd chuck a script into the MM contest. Hell yeah! Go me!
Thus my frantic brain drove my typing finger to pound the keyboard day and night. My keyboard received such abuse that it's been acting up since, backspacing at random to wipe out characters, but despite this technical difficulty I came up with not one, but 4 short scripts in the space of as many days.
I read them over with enormous pride, and entered a glowing self-congratulatory state of being that touched true nirvana, until I realized they were all sh!t on a stick. But that's besides the point! Winning is for losers, it's the trying that matters! Didn't Yoda say as much to Luke? I'm pretty sure he did.
I hadn't written anything script-ish for a while — heck I even blew this year's V.D. Contest (er, that's Valentine's Day, not...) — so I decided I'd chuck a script into the MM contest. Hell yeah! Go me!
Thus my frantic brain drove my typing finger to pound the keyboard day and night. My keyboard received such abuse that it's been acting up since, backspacing at random to wipe out characters, but despite this technical difficulty I came up with not one, but 4 short scripts in the space of as many days.
I read them over with enormous pride, and entered a glowing self-congratulatory state of being that touched true nirvana, until I realized they were all sh!t on a stick. But that's besides the point! Winning is for losers, it's the trying that matters! Didn't Yoda say as much to Luke? I'm pretty sure he did.
Sunday, 8 March 2009
Monkey pleasures
Sometimes I glance at the stats page just to see how many lost souls have accidentally stumbled onto my worthless excuse for a blog. Usually more than I'd expect, due to quirky search results.
Some of the search strings can be puzzling and/or educational. The "secret agent" variants I can understand given the blog's oddball name and my webcomic, but the others...? No idea. I have never, for example, written about nor once thought about naked priests (honest!) or monkey pleasures for that matter:
long gloves nose ring
Webcomic agents
british intelligence academy
secret intelligent agent
naked priests
wot is a secret agent
you got monkey pleasures we got intelligence forces
Stutmann family history
poor moderation dpaterso
a cigarette out on his
breast smothering fiction female agents
foolproof agent not eat
what do you call the british intelligence
mark anthony brennan
ROBOT CLEANER BURER
permanent cuffs
how do you get chosen for a tap on the shoulder british intelligence
agent british
peter grigor welding
derek paterson subatomic
tiny opaque insects in my floorboards
How to become a secret agent or intelligence sites
her girlfriend is locked in a cage gaged and cuffed
defunct british agents
agent jewelry europa
nope not a lick of intelligence found on the planet
how to fight like a secret agent
British intelligence officer kept human skull on his desk
secret agent web comic
howard penrose wiki
secret agent wages
O'Neil De Noux blog
barefeet corpse sheet
knockout (blow), cleave gag, rope, hands behind, ankles together, carrying
British intelligence priorities
drubber
sudlanders
How to be an agent of British Intelligence
secret agent earphone
double or quits bet
agent in Intelligence
outline of the Burgermeister's daughter
story of an Irish secret agent on the case of a gang of assassins and femme fetales
british story writer a secret agent
the gesture of parting your nose by forefinger of BRITISH
olee
where to buy secret agent earphones
crest british secret
absolute write water cooler derek
harley can't swallow peter north's load
how to make a british sheepskin backpack
duck feather pastry brush
portable advanced intelligence x-ray vision sunglasses
british flag stilettos
is the payment of change at chalkey wood noted on an intelligence camera
swashbuckler webcomic
i would like to be a secret agent teenager
Keep searching. The truth is out there.
Some of the search strings can be puzzling and/or educational. The "secret agent" variants I can understand given the blog's oddball name and my webcomic, but the others...? No idea. I have never, for example, written about nor once thought about naked priests (honest!) or monkey pleasures for that matter:
long gloves nose ring
Webcomic agents
british intelligence academy
secret intelligent agent
naked priests
wot is a secret agent
you got monkey pleasures we got intelligence forces
Stutmann family history
poor moderation dpaterso
a cigarette out on his
breast smothering fiction female agents
foolproof agent not eat
what do you call the british intelligence
mark anthony brennan
ROBOT CLEANER BURER
permanent cuffs
how do you get chosen for a tap on the shoulder british intelligence
agent british
peter grigor welding
derek paterson subatomic
tiny opaque insects in my floorboards
How to become a secret agent or intelligence sites
her girlfriend is locked in a cage gaged and cuffed
defunct british agents
agent jewelry europa
nope not a lick of intelligence found on the planet
how to fight like a secret agent
British intelligence officer kept human skull on his desk
secret agent web comic
howard penrose wiki
secret agent wages
O'Neil De Noux blog
barefeet corpse sheet
knockout (blow), cleave gag, rope, hands behind, ankles together, carrying
British intelligence priorities
drubber
sudlanders
How to be an agent of British Intelligence
secret agent earphone
double or quits bet
agent in Intelligence
outline of the Burgermeister's daughter
story of an Irish secret agent on the case of a gang of assassins and femme fetales
british story writer a secret agent
the gesture of parting your nose by forefinger of BRITISH
olee
where to buy secret agent earphones
crest british secret
absolute write water cooler derek
harley can't swallow peter north's load
how to make a british sheepskin backpack
duck feather pastry brush
portable advanced intelligence x-ray vision sunglasses
british flag stilettos
is the payment of change at chalkey wood noted on an intelligence camera
swashbuckler webcomic
i would like to be a secret agent teenager
Keep searching. The truth is out there.
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